DN: A Conscious Decision
by Tower of Babel
Summary: L has a theory and convinces Soichiro Yagami to visit his son in the dead of night to test Light's morality by talking to his subconscious mind while he sleeps, asking him serious questions. But after a series of unknown headaches, Light catches on, and has Ryuk reverse the process with consequences.


_**Death Note Story:**_

 _ **"A Conscious Decision"**_

L—the leader of the KIRA Task Force and the so called "greatest detective in the world"—watched Light Yagami as he sat at his desk studying in his bedroom. There were no cameras pointed directly at Light's desk, so L had to settle with looking at his back. But if Light said anything, he would hear it.

Cameras and wiretap equipment had been implanted secretly within the Yagami household because the teen was suspected of being the worse mass-murderer of all time—known as Kira. Albeit the idea was ludicrous that Light Yagami was Kira, L never undermine a lead, and followed everything to the end whether it turned to be nothing or lead to something else entirely. That made him thorough, and good at what he did, and renown within Interpol, and other International Police Agencies.

Kira had only appeared recently, but his reign of terror was quickly realized and hundreds of criminals had died at an alarming rate—mostly by an odd method. Kira's "default method"—if L could call it that—was by heart attack. Profiling a criminal was paramount and Light Yagami just seemed to fit the profile L had filled out, and the timings of each killing corresponded to a student, who lived in the Kyoto Region of Japan, where Light resided.

"The Yagami household seems too perfect," L recalled himself saying, after he reviewed the first week of surveillance, then ordered it continued. The Yagami household intrigued him.

There was something different about Light Yagami that L couldn't pin down. Yes, the teen was exceptionally smart—borderline genius—but he also had an arrogance about him that gave L a bad vibe, psychopaths expressed similar arrogant-like tendencies. And to a detective instinct was everything. L's instinct was saying to keep a close eye on Light Yagami.

So along with his father, Soichiro Yagami, he watched the Yagami household through CCTV in a hotel de facto headquarters. Soichiro had told his family that he had to be away for a little while for police business, which was the truth, but if they knew he was spying on them, in the hopes of learning whether or not his only son was in fact Kira, however, then they'd be very angry to say the least.

So far, Light Yagami wasn't revealing anything. L's data was based on conjecture and speculation at this point. But he had never been wrong before.

Several days of surveillance had passed without revelation. It was almost if his suppositions were incorrect. Criminals were still dying, but according to what he was witnessing, Light Yagami wasn't Kira. Yet his actions seemed contrived somehow, planned, as if to play to an audience, as if Light was putting on a show, knowing full well he was being watched. He was clever; did he know about the cameras? No, that seemed impossible. Unless he had some ESP power that gave him a second sight. He spent a lot of time in his room, but he spent an equal amount outside. If Light was Kira, that's when he would kill. But how was he killing? That was the main question L had to answer.

Soichiro Yagami sat beside him watching the jumble of monitors in the hotel room. The rest of the task force were busy doing other work, hunting down clues to Kira. There were more cameras in Light's room than anywhere else in the Yagami home. But everywhere was equally important.

L sighed. He felt watching the cameras at this time and hoping Light would give himself away, somehow, was moot. He needed something to happen and perhaps he could make something happen.

He spoke without moving, crouched on the couch that faced the screens, his legs folded in front of him. Light's father was seated beside him. "Mr. Yagami, I'd like you to go home tonight," L said. "I'd like for you to pay your son a visit. But don't misunderstand me, this won't be a social call. I want you to visit him in his room while he's sleeping."

"What's the point in that?" Soichiro asked.

"You said Light wants to be a police officer, so he should be familiar with the law. He spends hours every night studying. I would like to test him on his morality."

"I'm afraid I still don't understand. He can't answer me if he's asleep."

"That's where you're wrong. The unconscious mind has a way of revealing oneself that the conscious state hides. I would like you to ask Light a series of questions while he's a sleep. The technique is called 'Subliminal Conditioning'. While asleep, the mind is open and free. It's also completely susceptible to suggestion. If you ask him a direct question, he'll have no choice but to answer truthfully. If you do this, and I find his answers are satisfactory, we'll be one step closer to solving this case."

Soichiro Yagami was reluctant, but agreed with L's plan.

x x x

That night, while the family was asleep, he snuck into his own house and crept up the stairs, and into Light's room. He had recently observed that Light locked his door, but it was open tonight. In the dead of night, he stood over his son's bed as he slept. He looked so peaceful. He remembered nights when Light was a child and he did the same thing, just to see if he was still breathing. A parents curse; eternal worry for a child. He quietly brought Light's desk chair over and placed it next to the bed. Sitting down, he made sure the earpiece with a direct link to L was secure. L could also see everything via cameras.

"Very good, Mr. Yagami," L said, his voice low. "I know how difficult this is, but you must trust me on this. This could be important to the case. Now, check carefully that Light is asleep. If he's not in R-E-M sleep, this won't work. Once that's confirmed, this is what I'd like you ask him." L told him what to look for when a person is in R-E-M sleep. When the signs were apparent, L then told him what to say and explained to him why. Soichiro Yagami accepted his reasons.

Light slept facing the other way, so Soichiro leaned over the bed and began to whisper in his ear quietly and softly. He had been told he had a gruff tone of voice, but he had practised his tone on the way home, and now the frequency was perfect. "Light, hear my voice, son, but do not awake. I would like to ask you something, and you most answer truthfully."

" _Yes…_ " Light said softly under his breath.

Soichiro pulled back in a panic.

L abated Soichiro's concerns. "Don't be alarmed, Mr. Yagami. A person can talk in their sleep. It's perfectly normal. Please continue."

Soichiro leaned back over his son and spoke again. "Recite for me the core value of Japanese constitutional law, and why it is so important."

Light didn't speak for a moment, as if gathering the information. Then: " _The core value is the respect for all individuals. The right for each citizen to live a moral life is paramount and supersedes that of the nation state or a group._ "

"And what are the three main principles under the law?"

" _Pacifism; Fundamental Universal Respect; and General Sovereignty Under The State._ "

"Is it morally wrong to kill?"

" _Yes!_ "

Soichiro hesitated with the next question. The entire case could hinge on Light's response. But he was conflicted, and he did and yet didn't want to know. It was like finding out your son was gay. A parent may suspect, but didn't want to ask for an affirmative answer.

"If you had the power to kill. . . Would you take someone else's life?"

There was a moment of silence. Then Light answered: " _Murder is morally wrong._ "

L chimed in. "Well, he certainly understands the morality of law. I can honestly say he definitely knows right from wrong. He can't subconsciously lie. The unconscious mind is the backbone to all our core values. It defines who we are. Thanks for humouring me, Mr. Yagami. You can return back to the hotel now, if you wish." Soichiro Yagami stayed leaning over his son. He appeared to want to ask his son something else. There was a moment of silence. L said, "No, Mr. Yagami. Do not ask anything else. I know you wish know…but if you interrogate him further about being Kira, he'll wake up. I know I said if you asked him a direct question, he would have to answer truthfully, but asking him more would only spring up a defensive mechanism that'll trigger his conscious mind to awaken. If he wakes, you'll ruin everything. All will be revealed in time. Please be patient."

Soichiro Yagami nodded, then he leaned back. Replacing the chair back next to the desk, he again stood over his son's bed. He gently leaned over again, and whispered: "Light, I'm very proud of you. I believe in my heart that you are not Kira. You can't be. I have faith you will be cleared."

"Mr. Yagami, please… that's enough. You'll wake him."

Soichiro agreed, and then straightened. He then left his son's room.

x x x

But unbeknownst to everyone, the Shinigami Ryuk, who was also in Light's room, attached to the Death Note, unable to leave, had seen and heard everything.

x x x

The next morning, Light awoke with a headache. He felt it throb in his skull. He rubbed sleep out of his eyes. He had had a terrible dream, but the more he tried to remember its details, the more it faded from memory. The only thing that stuck was something to do with the concept of morality, a conflict of some sort. And the moment he thought of the Death Note, a sharp pain surged through his mind.

He grabbed the sides of his head, gritted his teeth in pain.

"What's wrong?" Ryuk asked, the Shinigami was perched down next to a far wall.

But Light couldn't answer him, the wiretaps would pick up his voice. He knew L was monitoring him. There was surveillance equipment all throughout the house.

He went to the bathroom, and opened the medicine cabinet where he took out a bottle of aspirin. He took two and washed them down with water. The pain subsided, but it was still there in the background, and even more so whenever he thought about the Death Note. Something about the Death Note was causing him pain. Was this a side effect of using it? Ryuk said there were no side effects other than the emotional fear of using a Death Note. And he wasn't afraid. But the pain seemed almost programmed, like someone had implanted a subliminal message in his mind.

He told himself to relax. Drops in weather pressure normally caused people headaches. If the barometer fell from the day before, if the day was hot and humid and then cool the next day, it often affected people. Over-activity in thought also caused headaches. Sooner of later it would subside, so he wasn't worried.

 _You have nothing to fear,_ he told himself. _L may be watching you, but you have everything under control. He has nothing on you. And if you continue as you have, he won't._

He dressed, had breakfast, and walked to school. Ryuk followed him the whole way. But throughout the day, he suffered one headache after another every time he thought of the Death Note.

With Ryuk constantly at his side, he couldn't help but think of it.

At lunch, he sat alone on a picnic bench outside. He had his wallet out with a piece of the Death Note, but every time he went to write on it, he suffered another intense headache. When he put the Death Note aside, his headache lessened. When he reached for it again, it returned with a vengeance.

"Do you think you should see the school nurse?" Ryuk suggested. "You've been suffering from these headaches all day. I think it's something serious."

Light put the piece of the Death Note away in his wallet, and his headache lessened. "I don't know what it is. It seems every time I think about the Death Note, I get this sharp pain, a splitting headache. Almost as if I'm conflicted with using it."

"Maybe it has something to do with what happened last night?" Ryuk prompted.

Light eyed Ryuk curiously. "Why? What happened last night?" Ryuk told him about his father paying him a visit last night in his room and speaking with him while he was asleep, and Light speaking back. Light's eyes widened. "I don't remember that! What did he say?"

Ryuk mused for a moment. "He asked you about Japanese Constitutional Laws, and you answered him. You seemed pretty knowledgeable. You answered every question he asked without fail."

Light panicked. "Is that all he asked?"

Ryuk nodded. "Yup, that's pretty much what he asked you. Most importantly, he asked you if murder was morally wrong. You answered yes. Someone was conversing with him through an earpiece, though, almost like giving him directions, and what to ask. To me, night is as clear as daylight. I saw everything."

"It had to be L. Damn him!" Light stopped himself from slamming a fist to the bench. He continued, "Subliminal Conditioning through the unconscious mind, that had to be it. Although it's not an advertised practise, psychologists sometimes use it on criminals to bait them into giving away clues to unconfirmed crimes in an unconscious state. I just happen to be researching it for uses with the Death Note.

"He played on the morality of good and evil. So every time I think of the Death Note, my mind sends out a conditional relax of pain. I know murder is wrong, but I chose to use the Death Note to help the world." He felt the headache return, the pressure intensify. "But I won't give up. I won't forfeit ownership of the Death Note. I'll find a way to overcome this. When I agreed to make a better world with the Death Note, it was a conscious decision, one I don't take lightly. My will is stronger. L can't stop me with mind tricks."

He turned to the Shinigami. "Ryuk, I need a little favour from you. And for this, you'll get a dozen apples in compensation if it works." Ryuk's face lit up in excitement. Apples were like drugs and alcohol to Shinigami, and any promise of more—Ryuk would do anything for them. "Tonight, when I'm asleep, you'll be my unconscious mind. You'll need to reverse everything that's been done."

"How?"

And Light explained everything, even what to say.

x x x

That night, when Light was asleep—it took Light sometime to fall asleep—Ryuk leaned over and spoke softly into Light's ear. And everything Light set-up for him to say, word by word, Ryuk recited.

But then Ryuk made one small addition, and snickered afterwards when it was done.

x x x

The next morning, Light awoke refreshed. What he told Ryuk had worked, and he no longer felt pain when he thought of the Death Note.

He stretched his arms above his head and embraced the day with new vigour. But a moment later he suddenly felt a damp warmth beneath him.

Swivelling off his bed, he patted a hand on the sheets.

 _No, I couldn't have!_

But he confirmed it by sniffing his hand and cringed at the smell of urine.

 _I've never. . ._

He then eyed Ryuk, withholding a sneer.

 _What did you do, Ryuk. . ._

And Ryuk chuckled.

END


End file.
